Four Fundamental Rules

#managing_others Sometimes the things you regret the most are the things you didn't say

For years, I've mentored ambitious technologists seeking career guidance. However, I've realized that much of my advice focused on tactics rather than principles—teaching specific skills that might work today but not tomorrow.

One such person was a colleague I'd call Ben. A few years ago, he sought my insight on managing stakeholders as he navigated leadership challenges. Despite years of feedback and mentorship, I never shared with him what I now understand to be most valuable. A few months after our last discussion, Ben died unexpectedly.

His passing was sad and forced me to reflect deeply on the guidance I've offered others. Through this reflection, I've identified four interconnected principles that form the foundation of a fulfilling career—principles I wish I had shared with Ben:

1. Stay Alive

2. Make (Enough) Money

3. Do The Right Thing

4. Take Care of Your People

This article explores these fundamental rules¹ that transcend tactical advice and speak to the core of what I believe leads to sustainable success.

1. Stay Alive

Your career ends when you die. Prioritize your physical, mental, and emotional well-being because while jobs and companies are replaceable, you are not.

For technologists, this means more than just avoiding physical harm. It means recognizing the toll that chronic stress, burnout, and neglect can take on one's body and mind. To manage the psychological demands of leadership, technologists should set clear boundaries between work and personal life, schedule regular health check-ups, invest in quality sleep, and make time for exercise, even during their busiest periods.

Without good health, you can't perform for yourself, your loved ones, or your organization. Youth brings a sense of invulnerability, but your professional timeline is shorter than you imagine. Be intentional about longevity because some of your beloved colleagues will start dying when your career spans two decades. It happened to me; it will happen to you.

When you stay alive and truly take care of yourself—physically, mentally, and emotionally—you create the foundation to focus on what comes next: building financial security.

2. Make (Enough) Money

With your health intact, you can focus on building financial stability.

While discussing compensation remains somewhat taboo in professional circles, financial security is key to career growth and autonomy. Money provides basic security and opens doors to enriching experiences that generate lasting memories. Career-wise, financial stability grants you freedom of choice—the ability to make decisions based on growth and values rather than necessity.

The key is defining your "enough"—the threshold at which additional income no longer meaningfully improves your quality of life. You can reach this threshold more deliberately by understanding your needs rather than chasing arbitrary wealth markers. Consider working with a financial advisor to create a clear plan aligned with your values and long-term goals.

When you have "enough," you unlock two game-changers: you can walk away from roles that no longer serve your growth and take smart, calculated risks that most people are too afraid to take. These might include starting a company, making a dramatic career pivot, or standing up for what's right even when uncomfortable. That's when careers become truly interesting and impactful.

3. Do The Right Thing

Financial security empowers you to uphold your principles. When facing ethical challenges at work—whether they involve data privacy, algorithmic bias, workplace culture, or business practices—Eckhart Tolle offers wisdom: You have three options: accept the situation, change it, or leave.

Having "enough" money enables you to advocate for what you believe is right without fear of losing your job. While most people think integrity is honesty, transparency, and compassionate behavior, it's also about aligning with your core values. For most people, violating these values leads to cognitive dissonance and restless nights.

Prioritize your integrity—make choices you can live with. Sleeping well at night isn't just about feeling good; it's about maintaining the mental and emotional strength that keeps you alive and thriving. A strong ethical foundation also creates the trust necessary to build meaningful relationships with your people.

4. Take Care of Your People

Throughout your career, you'll be on teams, lead teams, and meet countless people. Not all of these individuals are "your people." Your people share your values and beliefs—those with whom you can solve difficult problems, create meaningful work, and build memories you'll cherish long after the projects end.

When your career is over, you'll reflect primarily on experiences with your people. As you identify these individuals, nurture these relationships intentionally. In turn, they will support you through challenges and amplify your successes.

The youthful invulnerability discussed in Rule One can often delude us into thinking we can achieve greatness alone. Some talented individuals might achieve some early career wins, but the African proverb wisely states: "If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together."

Taking care of your people means investing in their growth, advocating for their success, providing honest feedback, and creating psychological safety. It means understanding their aspirations and helping them achieve their goals. When you genuinely care for your people, you build a network of mutual support that sustains you throughout your career and maybe even the rest of your life.

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These four rules create a virtuous cycle: Staying alive gives you the energy and focus to earn enough money. Enough money empowers you to do the right thing, even when it is hard. Doing the right thing attracts and retains the kind of people who will support you throughout your career. Having supportive people around you makes staying healthy, building wealth, and maintaining integrity easier.

While these principles might seem simple, they've proven invaluable throughout my career. I wish you a long career and hope they provide a framework for making decisions that lead to success and fulfillment.

1. This article was drafted initially as a LinkedIn post to receive public feedback. Originally, it contained three rules, but Pradeep Sanyal and Marco D'Alia reminded me that there are, in fact, four. Thank you all for the feedback.